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December 14, 2005

Linzes win the not-so-Amazing Race 8

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 6:46 PM | | Comments ( 1 )

The Linz brothers and sister ran a smooth final leg and literally cruised to the finish line to claim the $1 million prize as winners of The Amazing Race: Family Edition. Just behind them in a close second place were the Bransen family, with the Weaver family finishing third.

Linz Family

Departing from their last pit stop, the teams left Montana after some wraslin' at the airport between Nick Linz and Rolly Weaver which left both unharmed but caused more trash talk by Ma Weaver -- which pissed Nick off enough to say he wished he'd of broken Rolly's arm although you knew he didn't mean it. The teams fly to Montreal were they take a cab to the Underground City and all twelve people get LOST in the maze of metro tunnels while trying to find the clue box. In the austere, pristine, and endless corridors, the Linzes and Bransens manage to WALK PAST the clue box several times without seeing it.

Finally, they find it and are sent off to the next detour: a choice between "Slide It" or "Roll It." In "Slide It" the teams annoy their cab drivers on the way to McGill Arena where they must do some curling. The Linzes have a lot fun with this, as they do with everything, but not as much fun as the Beatles had with curling in the movie "Help." Ringo and George were especially good at sweeping as I remember.

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December 7, 2005

Pink Slipped! The Fightin' Godlewskis are Gone from Amazing Race 8

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 6:50 PM | | Comments ( 2 )

Not even rounding a corner at full speed could Michelle Godlewski eject her cranky sister Sharon from the back of the golf cart as the Pink sisters rolled up to the mat in last place on Amazing Race 8: Family Edition, and lose their shot at next week's final run at the $1 million dollar prize. The only thing we are left wondering is: will the sisters be speaking to each other again by Christmas?

The Godlewski Sisters

As the leg starts out, the teams headed to Turtle Ranch in Wyoming where they all ended up camping in their trailers yet again for another night. One of the kids asks Ma Weaver what a Turtle Ranch is, and she actually says this: "Its where they make lots and lots of turtles." (oh. my. gawd!)

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November 30, 2005

Amazing Race 8: City Slickers and Hot Air Balloon Wars

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 4:22 PM | | Comments ( 1 )

In the Utah to Wyoming leg of the Amazing Race 8: Family Edition, the four remain teams continue their land tour of the west and get to experience mid-air collisions in hot air balloons, city slicker-style cow punching, and the long wait for Old Faithful to sneeze.

Rachel and Rebecca Weaver

Leaving just after midnight, the first place Linz bruisers drive to a local high school where they learn they'll be helping a crew inflate a hot air balloon that will depart for a scenic ride over Utah starting at 6 am. The last place Weavers arrive to find they've caught up to the other teams, and rub it in that they've had an additional three hours of sleep over everyone else. Mom Weaver gets out of the truck and immediately starts the trash talking, and shouting at the Linzes, "Were you sorry you wasted your yield? You will be!" The Pinks are shocked by her brazen behavior: "What is her problem? Psycho."

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November 23, 2005

Amazing Race 8: "If You Live, Let's Go Out!"

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 4:34 PM | | Comments ( 19 )

The Amazing Race 8 families toured some amazing scenery in south Utah in the eighth leg of the tour and all the teams loved it - except the Weavers who didn't appreciate any of it. The desert, the mountains, Lake Powell, wide open spaces. Pfffft. Doesn't impress Rebecca Weaver, who says that anyone who thinks the world is overpopulated needs to visit there. Uhmm, what-eva Becka!


So the teams head out from the Lake Powell pitstop to Monument Valley, Utah to John Ford's Point. The Weavers reach the box first and receive a clue that tells two members to take a heli ride to the top of Elephant Butte. No challenge here, just a nice awesome view of desert and butte formations. You know - God's country. Rebecca yawns.

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November 9, 2005

Amazing Race 8: "The Experience is More Than A Million Bucks"

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 8:47 PM | | Comments ( 55 )

Phil Koeghan in Costa Rica"What the hell are we going to Phoenix, Arizona, for? I want to go to New Zealand!" Well said, Marion Paolo! Amazing Race 8: From Here to Costa Rica and Back, made a turn north and returned to the United States, to the exotic locale of Mesa, Arizona.

Let's begin the recap in Costa Rica, where the families take off for a beach and a roadblock in which one member will swim out to a bouy. In the ocean. Not. As. Easy. As. It. Sounds. (And I'm a swimmer.) Pa Bransen dives in for his girls; NickAlexTom goes for the Linz bruisers; and Pa Tony Paolo volunteers for his family, but quickly finds he's in over his head. Literally. He's helped back to shore by the rescue team.

"Oh, thankya, Jesus!" Ma Weaver intones as her son Rolly successfully swims to the buoy, then adds, "Dear God, maybe were going to catch them," as he makes it. Hey, call me crazy but, um, maybe it might be that your gorgeous strapping young buck of a son did it all by his self without divine intervention? Just a thought.

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November 2, 2005

Amazing Race 8: Leave it to Weaver

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 5:19 PM | | Comments ( 220 )

"We hate the Weavers" seems to be the emotional bond that's bringing the other teams together as the families headed off to Costa Rica in this week's 6th episode of Amazing Race 8. The embarrassing Weaver clan -- I mean the three crazy females, not poor, shy Rolly Weaver -- are self-professed Christians who are often caught on-camera spewing more hate than a neo-nazi rally.


The New Jersey Paolos are really coming together as a family and it's incredible to see that participating in a reality show for a month has done more for them than years of expensive therapy ever could. Ma Paolo annoyed every viewer during the first two weeks of the race but has morphed into the one you want to cheer for. Son DJ still yells but there are tell-tale signs he's treating both of his parents with more respect after they've come through for him every time. Boo-ya!

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October 26, 2005

The Pink Ladies are Sparred on Amazing Race 8

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 9:13 PM | | Comments ( 1 )

After four legs stuck in the U.S. on the Amazing Race 8 world tour, the teams have managed to leave home and travel to ... Panama! Yes, a U.S. protectorate! Woo-woo!! Departing from the last pit stop in New Orleans, the six remaining teams traveled by plane to Panama City, Panama, to play baseball and spot fake birds in the rainforest. But don't reach for your remote yet!

The Paolos

At the start of the morning, each family got their clue which sent them on boat rides down the Panama canal to find a dude lying in a hammock. The Gaghans had the most advertureous ride as their boat driver went the OTHER WAY to pick up another passenger. With much screaming and pleading, they convinced him to turn around and following the other teams, now well ahead of them.

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October 19, 2005

Amazing Race 8 Recap: The Battle of New Orleans

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 11:56 PM | | Comments ( 1 )

Teams headed to Alabama to Talladaga and the International Motor Sports Hall of Fame where they toured the track, not in race cars but in party bikes. The racers were as disappointed as viewers were.

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October 12, 2005

AR 8 Family Edition: My Stepmom is a Bitch

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 6:57 PM | | Comments ( 2 )

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October 5, 2005

AR 8 Second Leg: Never Sound Retreat

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 7:33 PM | | Comments ( 0 )

Faster than you can say "Stonewall Jackson must be spinning in his grave," we've arrived at leg two of the around the world East Coast race in The Amazing Race: Family Edition.


When last we left the bickering families, they were at the pit stop in Lancaster, Penn. Eager to get started, the families raced off to locate "The Big Shoe" House and get their next clue. Lots of shots of car doors opening and closing. Lots of confusion. Rolling of the eyes. Shouts of "Noooowon evah listens tooo meeeee!" Then we are treated to 9 IDENTICAL shots of the same "83 South" sign as the teams drive 110 miles to Washington D.C. via Baltimore. "Washington D.C.?" one family member asked. "What state is that in?"

The amazing part of this amazing race is that 4 adults in a car can't read directions. If it says "The Reflecting Pool in front of the Capital building," several of the team immediately thought "Ooooooooh! They must mean the OTHER reflecting pool in front of the phallus Washington monument!" Dumbasses.
, So off they race, the shouting Paolos trying to find a gas station (they're hard to find you know), the bratty twinkie kids (I'm seriously having evil wishes for that know-it-all kid), the w'dow Weaver and her constantly depressing widow banter, the Pinks ("Squeal!" "Shriek!" "OMG!" "Yeeeaaah!) who can make a car ride down the interstate sound like the front seat on the Kingda Ka Coaster in Jersey, and the Linz bruisers - who haven't shown much. Yet.

In this, The Cheesiest Race, the first espionage roadblock involved a "find-a-spy" task and exchange briefcases with the spook. And I must add here that Team My Three Daughters, or the Hooters family, is gonna have troubles with daddy before much longer. The race is barely begun and the pop is pooped. If they lose, it will be because of him. The Travelocity gnome from AR 6 had more pep than this guy.

After that easy task, the teams made their ways to Middleburg, Virginia, to the site of a civil war reinactment and their next clue, which was a Detour. In the detour, teams chose between "Heat of Battle" or "Heat of the Night." Wounded by cliches, most teams chose the physical task of carrying 5 soldiers on stretchers from the battlefield to a field hospital in order to get their next clue. The teams with smaller kids and overweight parents chose the easier task of filling 20 lanterns and lighting them.

I haven't seen so many "wounded" rebel soldiers lying on the ground since Scarlett O'Hara lifted her skirts and tip-toed over then in "Gone with the Wind." And did you see the families literally dump those wounded reinactors on the ground? Just - plop! and "Let's get another one!" Flip the stretcher and crashing down they went. Amazing that none of the play-acting injured actually got injured from that.

Well, the Weavers barely beat the Linz bruisers for first place and won a family trip to Bermuda. The Pinks (the Godlewski sisters) came in third. ("Squeal!" "Shriek!" "Ohmagosh!" "Yeeeaaah!)

And a final note: not only was the episode boring, but the cutest guy, Brock Rogers, 19, was eliminated along with his creepy domineering dad who sent the family in the wrong direction causing them to fall to last place. Too bad Brock wasn't on a regular 2-person AR race with his sister Brittney, 22 -- now THEY would have made a great team.

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recent comments

[ #] Joey Habberfield on Linzes win the not-so-Amazing Race 8 : I was just wondering when you guys came to Montrea

[ #] hayley on Pink Slipped! The Fightin' Godlewskis are Gone from Amazing Race 8 : kudos to the Weavers!

[ #] erica on Amazing Race 8: City Slickers and Hot Air Balloon Wars : rolly rocks! i loved it when he ran to the finish

[ #] Yvonne on Amazing Race 8: "If You Live, Let's Go Out!" : hahaha well i seem saying i love rolly isnt gonna

[ #] paige on Amazing Race 8: "The Experience is More Than A Million Bucks" : hey omg you r so fine give me a ring 785-8254332

[ #] hayley on Amazing Race 8: Leave it to Weaver : hey everyone! ok so the weavers are christians rig

[ #] on The Pink Ladies are Sparred on Amazing Race 8 : rolly is so hot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[ #] on Amazing Race 8 Recap: The Battle of New Orleans : OMG! YES, THAT 'BLOND 14-YEAR OLD' IS SOO CUTE!!!

[ #] paige on AR 8 Family Edition: My Stepmom is a Bitch : hey


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