Yo, American Idol wannabe Kellie Pickler: Your 15 minutes of fame are up. You may be a little minx and yor daddy may be in prison but America stopped feeling sorry for your lousy warbling and voted you off. Bu-bye! America -- you done good.
The cheerleader turned Sonic drive-in roller-skatin' waitress from Albermarle, North Carolina, has the good looks, southern charm, and the trailer park moxie to knock white trash queen Britney Spears off her pedestal.
Alas, if only she could sing it would negate the fact that the former Miss Stanly County is permanently stuck on stupid. After her performance Tuesday of the too-often sung "Unchained Melody," Simon Cowell told her she was "bland" and "robotic" - which in two words sums up her lackluster performances this season.
And WTF is with Paula Abdul? She's gone completely mental but I'm looking at her in a new light. When she jumped up and told Simon to shut it I laughed so hard I snorted
tequila Dr. Pepper outta my nose. And not in a good way. It hurt a lot.
I am finding Paula to be marvy entertainment and watch in awe as she sheds crocodile tears for Elliot - who is on my special list of "stars who's appeal I just don't get." Her drunken rants and crying jags are keeping me in suspense and I find myself tuning in week after week to anxiously await the moment when she opens her mouth. What Will Paula Do?
Simon was thinking of crying too when judged Kellie, telling her, "I thought that deserved tears but for a very different reason. ... I thought it was like the never ending song."
With Kellie gone, Paris Bennett, 17, escaped elimination for one more week and will go against Taylor "got ticks" Hicks, Elliott Yamin, Katharine McPhee and Chris Daughtry. My prediction for the final three: Taylor, Kat and Chris.