Madonna Admits to Being a Hypocrite

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 11:01 PM | Permalink | Comments ( 3 )

In another sign of the Apocalypse, pop diva Madonna, who views herself as a good role model, now says she may have taken things a bit too far in her younger days in an attempt to be a star. Oy vey!

The 46-year-old entertainer who's shtick included kissing Britney Spears on stage, burning crosses, publishing a porn book, and posing in Playboy, says she regrets promoting her celebrity based on sex.

"Sometimes I was being overtly sexy for the sake of showing off when I didn't need to be. I think I hurt myself," the singer recently told Ladies' Home Journal. "One minute I was saying 'believe in yourself' and the next minute I was saying 'just be sexually provocative'. I was letting it pump up my ego, thinking 'aren't I great, they're writing about me, my picture is on the cover of every magazine, I'm so fabulous.'"
, That was the old Catholic Madonna. She wants you to believe the New Jewish Madonna Esther has completed her RE-INVENTION as: British (with an accent!), a devotee of Kaballah (and serious about observing the Shabbat! All without being a practicing Jew!), and a children's book author. Bohica. The Material Slut is promoting herself as a bourgeoisie responsible parent so that you'll buy her books and stuff and keep the income rolling in. So, is there a hidden meaning to the title of her new children's book, "Lotsa de Casha"?

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Simpson Dad Tries to Smear Lindsay Lohan. It's Come to This?

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 9:34 PM | Permalink | Comments ( 5 )

It's going around that Joe Simpson, the father of Jessica and Ashlee , was furious after his daughters were banned from a Lindsay Lohan-hosted party and that he contacted tabloids with negative stories about the teen queen who he sees as a rival to his princesses.

You may have caught the stories about the incident at Lindsay's post-MTV Awards party at L.A.’s Standard Hotel. Since then, Daddy Joe has tried to plant multiple items about the snub in celeb rags across the country, including In Touch, Us Weekly, Life & Style, Star, and several newspapers.

One top tabloid editor said, "Joe called our head offices himself and ranted and raved about it. It was obvious he wanted to paint Lindsay as a bitch. He couldn’t believe anyone would dare ban Jessica from any party because, as he said, ‘She’s a huge superstar.’ Joe will do anything to make sure she’s in the papers every week and he knows Lindsay’s an easy target."
, Reportedly, Joe told the tabloids that he was not to be revealed as the source and, in one case, insiders are claming that he told them to write that the scoop came from a friend of Lindsay’s.

By Wednesday, coverage of the incident caused Jessica to call up People magazine to deny any feud between herself and Lindsay. A mouthpiece for Jessica then tried to turn the table to blame everything on the media saying, "The whole thing was blown out of proportion by the tabloids."

Out of proportion? Only because the tactic didn't work...

Meanwhile, there are new reports that younger daughter Ashlee is fed up with her pop as her manager and wants a new one.

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Paris to Quit The LIfe: Because She Won't Be Hot Forever

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 9:00 PM | Permalink | Comments ( 0 )

Paris Hilton wants to quit while she's still ahead. She claims that in two years she'll give up the public life to settle down and be a good wife to her future husband Paris Latsis and a good mother to her children.

"I thought it was cute to play a dumb blonde. On TV, I do it because it's funny. I consider myself a businesswoman and a brand. I don't enjoy going out anymore. It's such a pain. It's everyone saying, 'Let's do a deal! Can I have a picture?' I'm just, like, These people are such losers. I can't believe I used to love doing this."

So Paris wants to retire by the ripe old age of 26. Retire from what? Celebrity?

Well, you've got to give her some credit -- at least she'll be the wife of a mega rich shipping heir and not a sewer rat like Kevin Federline.

Jacko Verdict is in. View the Love From His Fans

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 11:34 PM | Permalink | Comments ( 0 )

Singer Michael Jackson has been found "Not Guilty" of all 10 charges against him this afternoon. And with that, the circus outside the Santa Maria courthouse is all but over.

Let's take a moment then, to look back at a "fair and balanced analysis" on the "Wacko for Jacko" fans in a recorded video as they express their love for the King of Pop.

In case you missed the mass of supporters who came out to give Jacko moral support these past few months, take a look at as Triumph the Insult comic Dog from the Conan O'Brien Show -- the top dog himself -- interviews a number of the singer's fans as they continued their vigil outside the courthouse where the trial was held.

This file is 25 MB, so you may have to wait a second or two for it to load. It's hilarious.

Rhona Mitra joining the cast of Nip/Tuck

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 8:29 PM | Permalink | Comments ( 0 )

The Hollywood Reporter has posted a reported that actress Rhona Mitra is joining the cast of FX Network drama series "Nip/Tuck" for the 3rd season which starts production today.

The report says that Rhona's character will be a New York detective who travels to Miami to investigate an attack against Dr Christian Troy (Julian McMahon). He's the playboy plastic surgeon on the show who attends Sexaholics Anonymous. I guess that means we can expect some good fireworks between these two?

Rhona's cop character is described as being a recurring role. So congrats to the British-Indian-Irish Rhona for scoring the American Drama TV Trifecta: she's now played a doctor, a lawyer, and a cop. Cheers! And she's only 29.

What's else is left to play on the character menu except in one of those fat husband/smoking hot wife sitcoms? Rhona would rock in that too. I suggest Ricky Gervais could play her funny fat husband. (Er ... not that I'm suggesting he's fat. Just wickedly funny.)
, Her fans are already aware that she and Monica Potter were fired from - or maybe they quit - "Boston Legal" last month. Which means that BL now has an average cast member age of about ... 75. That is so WTF? With Lake Bell (who will star in the new series "Fathom"), Monica and Rhona now gone, BL has eliminated all the hot women. But then, those Ally McBeal/The Practice/Boston Legal producers have a history of developing great characters -- then canning them just as things get delicious.

And while I'm not into celebrity autographs or anything, if I ever ran into Rhona Mitra on the street I'd ask if I could touch her hair. Gosh it's so fab.

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Are Jonathan and Victoria as Crazy as they Seem?

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 7:36 PM | Permalink | Comments ( 0 )

They're baaaaaaack! According to an interview the evil couple gave to Tvgasm.com, Jonathan Baker and Victoria Fuller say there was a lot of editing and other stuff on Amazing Race 6 that was done to make them look bad: like making her seem like a whiny ass and he a wife-beating control freak.

In the interview, they veritably "seeth" about host Phil and call him names (Trashing Phil is so NOT COOL!), and then tell how the Prime Minister of Canada called them, and how they lost 30% of their spa business right after the infamous shoving incident in Berlin.

Read the Tvgasm article for revealing details of what went on behind the scenes as they try to repair their reputation, about their claim that Hellboy Adam really ISN'T Gay ... and find out why Canadians hate Celine Dion. No, that last part has nothing to do with the article but the dozens of reader comments below it go off on a Celine tangent. Too funny.

Eva Longoria Cheers as the Spurs Paste the Desperate Pistons

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 4:52 PM | Permalink | Comments ( 2 )

Nice to see Eva Longoria back on TV on Sunday nights now that her show "Desperate Housewives" is in summer hiatus. She was sitting courtside at the NBA finals game 2 between the Detroit Pistons and the San Antonio Spurs cheering on her man.

Eva, being from Corpus Christi, Texas, and a long-time fan of the Spurs, dates hunky Tony Parker of the Spurs. And may I say that the Spurs are one of the better looking teams in the league what with the presence of Parker, Manu Ginobili and Tim Duncan? Yes, I think I may.

And while I'm on the subject, may I say that I love a purdy tat on a ripped deltoid as much as the next man-ogling woman but some of these players have some butt ugly art on their arms. Not Dennis Rodman f'ugly but bad enough. And the lack of originality with tattoos is getting extreme these days. Ooooooooooo! A sun! A large O with ~ ~ ~ rays emminating everywhere. Like there's not a million boys with one of those nailed on their shoulder...

What Did Eva think? Did she want to yell "Yo, Rasheed! Your tat is f'ugly!" cuz like I so wanted her to. You'd think if Piston players spent as much time shooting practice hoops as they do getting fugly tats inked on their arms they might stand a chance of winning the championship...

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Katie Holmes Says Scientology is "A Wonderful Thing"

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 4:49 PM | Permalink | Comments ( 2 )

The movement to liberate Katie Holmes-- a "young, gifted, actress held captive by forces we may never understand" -- has reached a fever pitch and even spawned a new website. freekatie.net is offering t-shirts and other shit you don't need but they would really like you to buy so they can cash in on all the madness.

Now that Katie has been sucked into the mind control Scientology vortex and is vulnerable to becoming a true believer, she is being taught that this big blue world is just a garbage dump along the intergalactic highway. And away she goes!

As any enlightened Scientologist (like Tom Cruise) will tell you, it was Long, Long Ago, in a Galaxy Quite Near that the Galactic Confederation (76 planets around larger stars and founded 95,000,000 yrs ago) solved their problem of overpopulation (250 billion or so per planet). The leader of the universe, Xenu, had 13.5 TRILLION people frozen and brought to Teegeeack (what we now call planet Earth) and had their bodies placed in volcanoes near Hawaii and the Canary Islands. Xenu them dropped H-bombs to destroy the frozen space aliens. (I am not making this up.)

, Then I think -- this is where Scientology gets tricky -- uh, electronic traps were set up to capture all 13.5 trillion souls whirling around in the nuclear winds. What happens to the souls after that gets wierd but they were shown films which tricked them into believing "false" religions like Christianity and Islam. Then they attached themselves to evolving humans, sort of like spores, and continue to infect us with these false beliefs to this day.

And it's up to heroes like Tom Cruise and his new sidekick Katie - the spunky little kitten recruit! - to spread the word about how to be saved from the space aliens who's souls inhabit our bodies. But fair warning - to reach the upper levels of nirvana in Scientology costs beaucoup bucks, about US$360,000. Poor people need not apply to Scientology!

You can read more details of alien cosmology at www.xenu.net and decifer this confabulation for yourself. When I first went to the website, I thought it was a joke, cuz the opening line reads:

Q: Why can't Lisa McPherson read this page?
A: Because she's dead.

But, uh, it's actually a serious page about Scientology. The sick humor may not have been intentional. Even better is the essay that gives the full run down of all things Scientology.

According to Tom, there are somethings we aren't meant to see while we are still bound in this earthly reality. But what a space empire founder L. Ron Hubbard discovered during his trips on LSD!

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Starbucks and The A-List of Caffeine Addicts

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 3:59 PM | Permalink | Comments ( 1 )

Coffee is the sweet nectar of life and it's the caffeine shot of choice judging by the Starbucks Generation of Stars. The folks at cityrag.blog did a collection of photos of celebs holding their name-brand brews over the past few months. A list that includes: Britney Spears, The Olsen, Jessica and Nick, Nicole and her DJ, Pamela Anderson, Macaulay Caulkin, Jessica Alba, Renee Zellweger , and Madonna to name names.

You can bet dollars to krispy cremes that Starbucks' super secret marketing plan gets a few hundred million bucks in free advertising whenever photos appear in tabloids with stars holding onto to the prominent large brown coffee cups. I wonder how many of these stars get their joe for free? Starbucks should just fire everyone in their marketing department. Who needs em when you've got all of Hollywood advertising your java? And to think The Gap forked over $40 million to Sarah Jessica Parker to pose in their jeans!

Billie Jean Is Not My Lover ...

Posted by Fara Kearnes at 3:15 PM | Permalink | Comments ( 0 )

Hilarious video! Want to know What Michael Jackson would look like if he were a cop and was 6'3" and weighed 250 pounds and took 3 minutes to pick out a flavor of Gatorade?

Yo! He'd still have the dance moves. Who's Bad? Beware of the video surveillance cam keeping a eye on that aisle of Fritos!