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And now, the latest Paris Hilton disturbing story

Posted by Fara Kearnes on March 3, 2005 3:52 PM |

Now that she's taken a break from making home-made porno films, the Hilton heiress hellspawn is taking driving lessons to flee quickly (vite! vite!) from stalking paparazzi.

That's an odd thing to do, since Paris Hilton has never met a camera she didn't like. I guess she doesn't want the paparazzi to get any good shots - seeing's how SHE's getting all the best pix of herself with her OWN camera phone.

The idea of her racing around the streets of Los Angeles and flying over enormous pot holes in fast car is about as believable as her acting career. Why, we all know traffic stopped there in 1989 and hasn't moved since.

She's told people that she took driving lessons in Monaco with "real racing cars." And claims that she has already put her new skills into action in L.A. late at night.

"I've driven on the streets at 140 miles an hour when no one's around." (And I'm an astronaut!)

What more could Paris do to shock us? We've had a look at her hotel room documentary filmmaking, so weren't even shocked by the raunchy snaps of her canoodling topless with veejay Eglantina Zingg. (Great name)

More shocking was Paris' lame excuse about the kiss: "Oh, We were joking around. It wasn't sexual." Yeah, what's up about getting nekked and swapping spit with a hot woman? To tell the truth, Paris shouldn't be embarrassed that her taste in women is better than her taste in men.

Oh and, Paris? Brittany called. She says your dog's ugly.


stop makin fun of paris get yo own fukcin life and mind yo biznezz. or else cum c us on the eastcoast and we'll resolve everything.... LUV YOU pARIS


i don't c wat da deal is wit Paris Hilton. i think she's way 2 skinny and she looks sick. Nicole Richie looks like she's on drugs all da time 2. Paris is way ugly and from wat u c of her she seems a total ho. wat a snob!

paris hilton is a fricking slut shes a whore and she has no life i dont no why people think she is pretty and she sucks at acting

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